Tuesday, April 21, 2015

The Teacher Dad - Creating Memories

When I think back to my childhood, I think of specific memories. I remember big family vacations to Disney World, Sea World, Dude Ranches (yes that happened), and also little things like my sisters and I laughing at local Chicagoland commercials, and coming up with our own "van" dances to particular songs on the radio. There are playground memories, school friend memories and crazy memories.. like the time our neighbor lady walked out naked in front of all the neighbor boys.. to her defense, her kids shouldn't have let us all in her bedroom to play video games while she showered! Yikes!

Being the parents of 5 kiddos, my wife and I are always looking for ways to create these positive memories (sans the nudity) for our kids and their grandparents, and all of our extended family. As a photographer (Machc Photography), my wife has done an amazing job capturing it all for us to display in our house, and further encouraging our families to help in creating these memories. 

So, over our recent spring break my parents, while visiting from Chicago, made sure to create as many memories as possible with our kids during the time they were here. From trips to the Oregon Zoo and Children's Museum down to hotel sleep overs, and Fro-Yo at Menchie's, the kids are still talking about the wonderful things there were able to do with their Granny and Gramps. It was an amazing trip, and I can't thank them enough!

A quick pic at the Oregon Zoo
The best part about it is that I've learned something from thinking about my memories and talking over with my kids what they thought the high points of the visit were, and it ultimately isn't about the big stuff. The number one thing they liked was being in the pool with the Granny and Gramps. A close second was the hotel continental breakfast the mornings after the sleep over!  What they remember from it all, and what I truly feel when I think back to my memories are the feelings of happiness, love, and togetherness. It's those feelings we, as parents, have to recognize and encourage even through the taking to school, picking up from school, taking to practice, doing frustrating homework, cleaning up spills, and all the other chaos. We have to remember to keep those feelings front and center for our kiddos, so they can look back and feel those moments with us. So that funny song we sang on the way to practice in the car was a moment we let ourselves enjoy too. 

So go.. enjoy the moments with the kiddos to create memories you all will be able to look back on later down the line.

Thanks again for reading my blog, and sharing it with your friends! I'd love to hear some of your funny/silly memories, so please share in the comments below! 

Sunday, March 29, 2015

The Teacher Dad - More Thoughts on Common Core

I've been seeing a lot of posts in my Facebook feed like this:



Commenters then argue back and forth over the answer with many complaining about the "new" math common core has the kids learning. Some of the parents are irate going so far as to placing blame on the liberal media or our own President. Calm down already! 

The truth is that math hasn't changed. There is no "new" math. The common core is just a set of math and English standards, or more clearly, grade level expectations. The point of the common core is to set national learning expectations for all grade levels. That means all 2nd graders will be expected to know the same level of math all across the nation. Regardless of socio-economic conditions, budgets, or local culture. These expectations may be unreasonable or over done (I touch on this here). But the fact is the common core is here for a little while, and it might mean you parents have to brush up on things. Especially those of you that are seeing your kids come home with more homework in the early elementary grades where as young as 3rd grade they need to understand fractions...Oh no!! Fractions! 

For now, the answer to the above problem is 100. Parentheses first. Then multiplication or division which ever comes first from left to right. In this case... Divide first multiply last. 

I never did like Aunt Sally... Smelled of cats and cabbage.. And that hair lip.. No excuse for any of that! Yuck! 

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

The Teacher Dad ebook!

It's true! I wrote an ebook! It has always been a life goal of mine to write a book... I was a few credits away from a minor in English if you really want to know. :)

I wrote this Teacher Dad ebook to help parents better approach teachers regarding classroom concerns by acting as the kiddo's advocate and expert. Be it with an IEP, 504, or a general learning hurdle, this book will be able to give some ideas on how to build a partnership between parents and the teacher. It also fills you in on what you should be expecting of a high quality teacher regarding how your student's struggle should be handled, and when a teacher has crossed the line.

I couldn't be more excited to have this out there as a resource to help parents navigate the often difficult process of talking with a teacher about how to best help a student. You can find the book by following this link (here).

Thanks for supporting the Teacher Dad!

End of week blues

The end of another week is quickly approaching. You would think that as a father of 5, I look forward to the weekends. And for the most part I do. As soon as we hit Saturday afternoon, things start getting much better. It's just that Friday night to Saturday morning time that is ruthless.  The exhaustion from school each week wrecks my kids, and truly sets in after school on Friday. It hits us all like a ton of bricks, to the point where my wife and I seem to be scrambling each Thursday to come up with a way to help smooth out our Friday afternoon.

Don't get me wrong, my kids are amazing kids. It's just by the end of each school week they are simply spent. They put a lot into being the best they can at school. They hold on through the boredom, social anxieties, academic anxieties, and the overall need for staying out the trouble only to fall across the finish line after a long week.

The hard part about this is that they demonstrate how tired they are by acting out. They lose all filters and impulse control. They are all naturally active kids, so the activeness stays, but most control of themselves vanishes. Sudden breakdowns are common. Combine the breakdown with a super tantrum and I just try to hold on through the perfect storm. It's quite remarkable.. really... when you look at it from a distance. 

As we've watched this exhaustion lead to tough behavior each week, we've gained a couple insightful options that could help families in similar breakdown/exhaustion cycles.

1) Keep to a routine. After a long week, it breaks kids further to go home and learn of an unplanned event on a Friday. Keep after school on Friday to a know schedule with plenty of relax time or decompress time. Maybe that's with an electronic device, but that's okay. Just keep it low key and routine focused. We have pizza Fridays to keep that steady, so they know what's coming.

2) Playdates are good distractions. We found this little nugget a few weeks ago. Our oldest was invited to a friend's house and our 2nd in line had a friend over. It was glorious to have sibling separation, and the distraction of a friend. The kids had a great time, and by the time all play dates ended. We had dinner, a book and bed. A few break downs along the way, but not an entire afternoon full of them!

3) I've seen other families keep Friday for game night, movie night, or some other family focused activity. I know my crew would love art night Friday's.... That just piped in my head!! Gonna have to further think that one through! 

I'd love to hear your ideas or best/craziest end of week break down story in the comments below! Thanks for reading!


Saturday, March 14, 2015

What I've Learned in Leaving the FNSBSD

Prior to this school year, I spent 9 years as a teacher in the Fairbanks North Star Borough School District. A district that in recent weeks is again (2 years running) in the local paper with stories about budget shortfalls, HR problems, and more teacher pink slips (no more music or arts classes is what I hear). I left the district in what is now clear to me as the lowest point in the district's history. And I now find myself in a district that is thriving. A district that shows no budgetary concerns, is hiring teachers, and has a history of student success through graduation rates, SAT/ACT scores, and state test scores. Everyday, I look around in awe at the complete shift in experiences, and ask myself, "How can there be such a drastic difference between these 2 districts?"

I've spent a lot of time reflecting on this question, trying to find meaning to all of it. I've listed what I see as the primary reasons behind how FNSBSD is falling behind compared to my new district.


1) Money: I'm not going to lie. My new district has it. A decent amount of it. We live in a community with a higher median income, and one that isn't afraid to share with the school district. Most of the families that move here do so because of the schools and our reputation. The people have money and they are more then willing to put that toward the education of their kids.

The truth, however, is that there is money in the state of Alaska. I believe the budget short falls have been created by the decisions of state officials to defund education. As I see it, there is a lack of trust in what the districts are doing with the money, how it's being spent, and the overall educational results. And to a certain degree, I agree with them. 

In Fairbanks, there is quite a bit of money spent on "things." When I was at North Pole high school, there were 4 complete sets of TI-Navigator systems that were simply purchased. Most just sat there, and my guess is that they still mostly just sit there. Much like the many classroom sets of iPads, iPods, SmartBoards, and other fun technology. Now, these items are not the reason for the budget shortfalls, but more a picture of the spending that happens. 

In my new district, all purchases for classroom learning items (like the ones listed above) are gained through grants. Teachers write for district grant funds by explaining how the technology they would like will be used to enhance learning. These are then read and approved by the board. The money is spent with a direct intention. Teachers and administration communicate to make purchases based on student need. The teachers are trusted to help make those decisions, and the board and admin team proudly support those needs. For a new teacher like me, it means that I don't immediately have the access to the items I had in Fairbanks, but I know that I can write for a grant to get the items that I know will enhance my teaching practice. 

This is obviously just one little picture. However, I'm amazed at how morale within the school can be so strong simply in how the community supports us educators. And I don't mean just through the money, although that helps. I mean in the everyday things. When I'm meeting new people, and I mention that I teach at the high school, they talk with pride about how great our district is. And that's from young parents to grandparents. There is pride in being here, and supporting the schools. It's amazing. So as we continue to show results, we are in fact earning the finical support of the community. This is something I hardly ever felt while teaching in Fairbanks. 

2) Leadership: During my 9 years of teaching in the FNSBSD, I can remember 3 maybe 4 different superintendents. That's a lot. How can a district get a sense of where it's going if the "captain of the ship" is constantly changing? I moved to a place where the current superintendent has been a part of the district for 19 years. 19 years! Our principal has been in his position for 9 years. Together, they are the backbone of what is nothing but support to the teachers and staff in the district. Their student centered message is unified and clear. It is also clear that they work only to enhance our efforts for the kids. There isn't an us verse them vibe. They know we are working for the kids, and they support that. 

They ask us (the teachers) what we need from professional development (PD). They don't hire whatever outside speaker they can to preach at us. They instead encourage us to step into teacher-leader roles. Or to come up with ideas for PD throughout the year that we can get paid to teach to our peers. If I'm doing something awesome in my class, I can hold an after school class/workshop to show other teachers about it. The PD moneys then stay in-house, and are put towards what the teachers want/need. We are encouraged to use our voice to make positive changes. 

This has been hard for me. I wanted desperately to have a voice in FNSBSD. I frequently felt as though I wasn't being heard, and that we were constantly being talked to by the untouchable admin. It was "them" making decisions, and the teachers just dealing with it. The input they received was controlled in that those that were part of teacher committees, were often selected by the admin. And I say often and not always, because occasionally we were given an opportunity to speak our minds. It just wasn't always acknowledged. 

The strength of the leadership and the relationships they've created with all of the district staff is so noticeably different between the two districts. It is even different in how each has dealt with implementing the new Common Core based state standards (CCSS) as well as a new teacher evaluations. From day one, I've heard nothing but positive support from our educational leaders. Encouragement that we can handle the new expectations even with a change in teacher evaluations. Every week we're reminded that the CCSS don't define our students, and that we, the teachers, will work each day to help our students grow within the standards. And that it's not about them meeting these idilic standards, but that we can demonstrat that our efforts show student growth within the standards. There isn't a sense of fear trickling down each day like I remember from last year when CC was looming over us. We are supported, and valued for what they know we can do. 

3) District Size: I can't be too hard on the leadership in Fairbanks, because in all honesty, how many former educators can truly handle managing a district the size of FNSBSD? It's huge! Thirty-three schools in all when you count the elementary, secondary, and each of the schools of choice. That's insane! It has to be near impossible to oversee anything with a single superintendent, and two assistant-superintendents. Throw-in the number of employees needed, and it's no wonder the HR department is having a hard time keeping up. I wonder how long it takes a new superintendent to remember the names of all the principals! 

I went from that, to a district with a total 10 schools. Six elementary, 2 middle, and 2 high schools (1 main campus and 1 school of choice). I've grown to truly believe that the size of a school district matters. As in anything, the larger in number a group grows the harder it is to manage. Especially, when the message from the leader isn't clear or leadership is constantly changing. 

I find it hard to see FBNSBSD ever trying to restructure. But if I could, I would break that district up as fast as possible. Separate North Pole and Salcha into one district, maybe? I don't know. It would be great to see one day. 



Overall, I loved being in Fairbanks. My wife was a student of FNSBSD. She was the 4th generation of her family to be born in Fairbanks. We moved there, believing we were going to stay and raise our family. It was so hard to say goodbye to the people we love. But, as I see more problems for the district, I realize that my hand was in many ways forced to make a change. And while some days it hurts, the majority of my days are looking around feeling so fortunate to having been hired in my new district. In a district that encourages me each day to take an active role in leading my students and peers into the common core era.

I wish nothing but better days for the teachers of the amazing students in FNSBSD. I hope that budget shortfalls don't do further damage to the district, and I hope beyond hope, that the new superintendent has the courage to lead the district with pride, strength, and an ability to give voice to many who've been without it for too many years.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. Please feel free to leave comments, thoughts, or feelings below. 

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Happy Birthday Dad

My dad turned 66 a couple of days ago. It's crazy for me to wrap my head around that. Especially since my oldest son and I share the same birth month with him. I find myself comparing my life timeline to his. My son turned 9, so when I was 9 what was my dad doing with his life

As I've mentioned in past posts, I'm competitive, so it's natural for me to look at our fathering styles and career success in a "who was where" type of way. I remember my dad always being too tired to play as I got older. That on the weekends, I would feel let down when it came to active attention from my dad. So I've done what I could to be more active in the day to day; to make lunches each day; to pick the kids up from school; to build Legos, go on walks, head to the playground... To be super active. 

And up until recently, my take away from my own dad was left only on the "what I wanted to do different." And I realize now, all the things I wish I would have done the same from the beginning. 

I realize now that while he may not have been an "active" dad, he was always there. He made it to all of our sporting events. We knew he was there because he would be the loudest supporter.. "Go Vikes!" He would always have advice and a solution to any problem. And he showed me what it was to work hard for the people in your life. To provide. To take care of all the "assets" from each other, to our cars, furniture, and clothes. And he did it so well, that I didn't pay the best attention to it. Until now... I see now all that I was supposed to have learned from my dad. 

As a kid, I would hear my dad say, "I love you more than you'll ever know" any time I told him that I loved him. I now get what he was saying, and I realize that I have some things to fix. It's time for me to to take better care of my "assets" while maintaining some of the active fathering I've done so well.

So, to my dad: Thank you for still always being there for advice and support. I appreciate you and your love for me more than you'll ever know. 

Saturday, February 7, 2015

9 years and counting

Nine years ago today, my oldest was born!.. I know, right? Where did that time go?! So much has happened over these past 9 years. All milestones that themselves are remarkable. It's not always been easy... ok it's rarely been easy. I mean, being a good parent is tough! There are so many choices to make that shape the life of each child. Tempers flare when maybe they shouldn't have. Schools are chosen that weren't the best fit. There are falls and scrapes; sick days and tantrums; laughing and playing; hugging and crying. And in each moment the person he continues to grow into teaches me about myself each day.

As a first born myself, I always felt like the Guinea Pig child. All things that didn't work for me, were changed for my sisters. I went through my childhood as the test child, so the lives of the younger ones could be better. And in some ways that was true, and is in fact true for my oldest. But what I'm realizing is that there have been plenty of victories that my wife and I can celebrate. not every decision we made for him has been a "mistake" or a learning moment. We've actually done a pretty darn good job! And.. if it makes him feel better, we continue to make mistake with his 4 younger siblings.

The most crazy part about today, is that in turning 9 he is now halfway done with his childhood. In 9 more years he'll be choosing a college, and getting ready to attempt his journey into being a grownup. These past 9 years have felt like they have flown by, so naturally the fear of the next 9 going just as fast is real. In fact, when my MiL brought that up with me last night, I jokingly yelled at her that she's not allowed to bring that kind of stuff up! I'm not ready to think about it!

So, for me and my wife.. it's time to buckle down. Time to make the next 9 years full of the best memories that will keep us all learning and growing together. Memories that we will share and have well after he does finally leave the nest. We have to make sure that each day is full of enough love for him to know, and for each of our kids to know, just how much we truly adore them.

So, wherever you are today, please say a happy birthday to my oldest. He is the most remarkable 9year old in the world.. a fact supported in that after just waking up, and announcing, "I'm officially a 9 year old," he went straight to cleaning the cat litter... on his birthday! Clearly, my wife and I have done something right. We are so lucky to have him, to learn from him, and to have his unending love. He makes us the best parents in the world!

I love you so much buddy.. so very much!