St. Baldrick's.. because I hate cancer!

I know that I'm not alone in hating cancer. And I don't typically come out and say that I hate anything.. But I really, truly hate cancer with a passion, and how it damages a person and a family. Since I was 17 years old, cancer has been involved in my life in some capacity. But over the last 10 years, it's impact has been
overwhelming. I've lost 3 relatives directly to cancer since my oldest was born. I've also nearly lost my mom to heart disease related to her cancer treatments. And these feelings were compounded this past week with the "anniversary" of my Godmother's passing. She's the second of my aunts to lose the battle to cancer. Her death was incredibly hard for me, because she always made it clear that her role as my Godmother was special for her. I knew that I was a special part of her life, and other than my mom, there was no other special "role model" woman in my life than her... She's missed for sure.

With all of the ways cancer has impacted my life over the years, it was, and continues to be, an easy decision to participate in annual St. Baldrick's events. When I was approached to participate for the first time 10 years ago, I had two family members losing their battles. It came at a time that I needed to do something. I felt so powerless, and participating in St. Baldrick's provided a way for me to feel like I was could do something to at least honor their struggles.. their pain. I wanted to do it for my mom, her sisters, and my grandparents to let them know that I was with them.

To date, my participation, and the participation of others on teams that I've "captained" have raised over $14,000! I'm humbled by all that I've been able to do to show my love and support to all that battle cancer and its damages everyday.

I encourage all to please take the opportunity to put a few dollars to St. Baldrick's this year. AS much as I hate the idea of my family fighting cancer, I hate more the idea of kid.. a child, having to go through the same battles. Click the link below to go to my St. Baldrick's page.

https://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/849242/2016

A teacher and a tie

"I don't trust a teacher in a tie."

This was spoken in my direction from a fellow teacher as I was leaving my school recently. My quick response was, "I know, right? So, untrustworthy." This teacher was walking ahead of me and continued by saying, "I at least recognize you, so it's not your first year." It's at this point that I realized this person was suggesting that I was only in a shirt and tie because I was new to the school. I could feel the resentment to my newness. So, I hit my teaching peer back with, "no, it's my second year here, but my 11th year teaching."

As expected my teaching comrade spun around with a distasteful look, and said, "oh, so you're going to be an admin then, huh?" The disgust and judgement oozed off of every syllable of the question. I answered, "possibly." The reply was, "figures." And that was the extent of the conversation.

When I got to my car I laughed. Having just finished reading this blog post written by a veteran teacher calling out other long time teachers for their lack of leadership, and overall negative approach to the teaching profession, I realized I had just experienced this veteran teacher angst first hand. Sure it stung a little, but I totally get it. Teaching is just f#@$ing hard. I know to the outside world it doesn't look like it is, but when you do it right, it's exhausting to put so much passion and effort into teaching 100+ kiddos a day. Sure we get summers off, and nice holiday breaks, but after 20 years, it takes it's toll.

So then to watch the world around you change, and the social perception of educators change, it has to be so hard to wake up bounding out the door to work with kids that simply need you to motivate them to learn. It becomes easy to cash it in, and just start making it through year to year. You pick your top yearly lessons and hang your hat on the popularity of that single moment in the year. You adjust how it's written to meet the newest content standards that have been passed down to you.

Then you watch as the next crop of young teachers step in with tons of energy, enthusiasm, and "strategies." It's just hard. I totally get it. I'm 11 years into the profession, and I've tried leaving multiple times. I've interviewed for business positions trying to dust off my marketing degree. I'm tired too, but for me I always get called back to wanting to be in the classroom. It totally helps that I'm new to this school, and that over my 11 years teaching I've been in 3 different schools. I've mixed things up, and not allowed my career to be stagnant. My guess is that many of these "grumpy" veteran teachers have been in the same classroom for over 10 years! They need a change, and summers just don't cut it. They need a new class to teach, or a new school, or a new set of responsibilities. Sure that puts more on admins to recognize when a teacher needs that jump start, but it's super necessary.

Because the alternative, is a bunch of veteran teachers picking on people wearing ties.. and that's not cool! My mom gave me that tie! And I look damn good in it! I've been wearing a shirt and tie to teach for all of my years in the profession. I know that most teachers don't, but for me I see it as another way that I demonstrate to my students how seriously I take my job. I want them to know that dressing professionally isn't just for business folk, and that being a professional is something that you can display in looking nice for work.... and my MOM gave it to me! It's a nice tie!

Have you been "bullied" by a grumpy veteran teacher? Tell me about it in the comments below. And what do you think, is the veteran teacher angst just exhaustion from working a tough job for so long?

Call the sub! I'm staying home!

This past week was exhausting. Four out of the seven of us were sick with flu like symptoms creating a home environment that can best be described as survivalist. There was plenty of laundry done, and insane amounts of ginger ale and toast consumed while we did our best to get the house feeling better.

And I get to use the pronoun WE, because I was there helping each and every minute. I ended up taking 3 sick days to be home to help with the all that went into taking care of my sick family. So, with Monday's holiday and my 3 sick days, I had a 1 day work week!...errr.

When I first started out teaching, taking sick leave was something I hated. I disliked being away from my classroom, because it was MY classroom. I'm in control of what happens in there, and how the kids learn. It is my responsibility to get things done, and if I'm gone, I have to trust a substitute to take over... and that never goes well.. or hardly ever! I would feel guilty for missing, and worry that it made me look bad. I mean, people don't take time away from work! It's just not natural!

I grew up watching my dad take little time away from work. He'd work long hours during the week, and would often go in on weekends. As a CFO, he was responsible for so much at the office, and that weighed on him pushing him to bust his butt at all cost. I watched that everyday, and believed that I would also spend every waking minute working while finding time here and there to make a sports game or to coach.

But over the last 10 years that I've been teaching, my views on taking time off have changed. Sure, I still know that chaos is expected when I return to my classroom. "Mr. Mach, the sub didn't know anything, and you need to reteach it all!" That my favorite pencil will be gone.. seriously.. who takes a nice mechanical pencil!!!?? And that it's really days of instruction and progress lost. That said, I have to put my family's needs first in those moments. I could have just gone to work this week, and left my wife who herself was sick alone to take care of the throwing-up kids. That would have been the best idea, if I truly didn't like being married or seeing my kids.

I have learned that taking care of my family is more important than the properties of Kites and Trapezoids in a high school geometry class. And sure, I have an important job, but using my sick leave doesn't make me a bad person. If anything, it shows my students that I value my family, and take pride in being able to help out at home. For some of the kids, that may be a more important concept to learn than that the diagonal connecting the vertex angles of a kite is the perpendicular bisector of the diagonal connecting the non-vertex angles AND is also an angle bisector to the vertex angles! Awesome info? Sure it is! But it isn't more important than the health of my family!

Now, tell me how you feel when your kid's teacher is sick and not at work. Do you take sick days from your position?

Lessons from Diane Sawyer's interview with Sue Klebold

Last night, my wife and I watched Diane Sawyer's interview with Sue Klebold, the mother of Dylan Klebold. For those of you that recognize the name but can't place why, Dyan was one of the "Columbine Shooters." We never intended to watch the interview. In fact, we had no idea it was even going to be on. But, being that we are parents, educators, and hobbyist sociologists (ok my wife has a minor.. I dabble), we couldn't stop ourselves from watching. 

It was clear from the first moment we laid eyes on this woman, that her life had been shattered. Just close your eyes, and think about what she has experienced. I'm sure you don't want to, because it was HER kid that did this. But that's the thing. You know how much you love your own kid or kids. How your heart just beats for them, and you do all that you think is right. But there is no manual. There is no way to know for sure, especially as we get caught up in the busy of our lives. It's overwhelming to sit in those feelings and imagine the life she has lived since that day. 

As the interview went on, there were so many emotions that we went through as we relived that day, but as parents, not as the college students we were back then. We send 4 kids to school each day. We pack their lunches, do hair, check for glasses, and load them up with, at times, just a quick "love you" & "see you after school." It's the same way many of the parents of the victims did that day, and the mornings before any of the countless school shootings since. We sat numb at the idea of that quick morning "goodbye" being the last. There is no fairness to any of it. To lose a child at a place that we trust to be safe is world shattering. It shouldn't be possible.

This feeling goes further for my wife, because she's married to a teacher. A high school teacher in a very large affluent school. I'm charged with not only educating my students in math, but also being on the front lines of student/teenage life. Any more, what is the job of a great educator? It can't be expected that we JUST teach kids content.. can it? With all that happens in the lives/development of teenagers, how can we not want our teachers to build relationships with the kids? At this point, it has to be a part of the job description. We have to expect our teachers to role models, and figures of support. NOT just content drivers, or standards enforcers. But how do we make that happen, encourage it, or even put that in a contract when all discussion is on budget cutting and the importance of STANDARDS!! 

It's crazy to know that before the shooting at Columbine, one teacher did contact Dylan's parents to let the know about a disturbing paper he had written. It was passed on to the counselor, and no further action was taken. Dylan and the second shooter, Eric, had also been arrested for felony theft. The judge gave little to no punishment. Both events were calls for help. But these signs were missed, and with the continuation of school shootings in our country, these signs occasionally still go missed. 

So, what is the takeaway from all of this? For my wife and I, it's that we can't get caught up in the bustle of our everyday to the point where we overlook the importance of special or significant little moments. That moment of "goodbye" needs to be special each day. Each hug, each worry, each bit of sadness needs to be taken with equal love & concern for each of our kiddos. But further than that, our concern and care needs to extend to the friends of our kids, to my students, to my wife's clients, and to the family we have all over. It's so easy to get caught up in money concerns, deadlines, house cleaning, laundry, or even political campaigns to the point where those little signs are written off. If anything, last night's interview was a reminder at just how important our roles as parents, teachers, and role models are each and everyday. We all have a responsibility at helping support the lives and success of each and every kid that crosses our paths. It's not that Dylan's parents failed him, it's that many of his calls for help went unnoticed by all the adults in his life. Sure his parents own a great deal of that burden, but I know that if he were one of my students, I would own the responsibility I had in overlooking the help he needed. It's my job to know my students, and to care for them beyond if they know how to use the quadratic formula or not. It's my responsibility to be great for my kids and my students. 

Now tell me what you think. Use the comments below to share your memories of that terrible day at Columbine. Did you watch Diane Sawyer's interview? Do you feel like your school is a safe place? What makes it a safe place? 

"Fresh, Clear, Well Seasoned Perspective"

I'm a Pixar fan... Ok... A huge Pixar fan! So, often times scenes from those movies will pop in my head triggered by the words I just said or even events surrounding my everyday living. This past week several events caused the scene below with Mr. Ego from Ratatouille to pop into my head.

Perspective... A huge theme for my week. I've needed a good heaping serving of it to keep me grounded as the week lead me up to today, my oldest kiddo's 10th birthday! It's hard to believe that I've been a dad for 10 years. This week has given me time to reflect on what these 10 years have been for me and my family. And when I'm deep in reflection, I often play the "what if" game. What if PK was an only child..? My mind spent a lot of time on that this week. I see Facebook, and all the wonderful lifestyles of my friends with 1 or 2 kids. I fantasize at the financial comfort my wife and I would have. How her business would have grown more. How I would have not only secured my masters quicker, but maybe I'd also have an admin license. I dreamed of the house we'd have. Would we still be in Alaska? What if we stopped at 2 kids..? What if.. What if.. What if...?

Then I would sit back and take in the perspective. How could I live without any of my 5 kids? That just wouldn't be right. They are all amazing kids and I couldn't live a day without them. And who's to say that we wouldn't have endured different hardships having just had a single kiddo? Sure things have been tough, but in the last ten years, we've done so much! We've added 4 more kids, lived in 5 different homes, had vacations, weddings, earned a master's degree, started a business, started a blog, and showed our kids what living and family is all about. My wonderful 10 year old is who he is today because he is the big brother to 4. His kind, loving nature, imagination, and passion are all enhanced because of his siblings. So more perspective, how would it have been fair for him to not have his MGM, A-town, OE, and ZuZu? .. Perspective!

My second connection with perspective is truly it's own post, but fits the theme too well! So, I'll sum this part up just to keep PK's bday celebration at the center of things! Earlier this week, my wife shared with me a headline and article from the newspaper in Fairbanks, our old home. The story was about the school district looking to cut 80% of the nurses employed and working in the schools. Of course, this is being done in an attempt to trim costs in a school district that has been struggling for years now (increased class sizes, difficult contract negotiations, buildings with leaks due to trees growing on top of them).

Cut to my staff meeting this week, where I listened to the "big" worry for my school admin team... "We should have 22% of our student body eating free and reduced lunch, but year to year those numbers are going DOWN. Why aren't they filling out the paper work?" Then we got a break down of which activities the "subgroup" participates in and heard about the difficulties in trying to figure out how best to engage this group of kiddos more with sports/activities.. "...but how do we do that with say, the swim team? They have practice at 5:15am every morning!"

Perspective.. there are plenty of middle to upper class school districts doing more than fine in our country, and will continue to do more than fine while the schools of our lower to low-middle class districts will continue to fall apart. There is no fairness to this. It's time for more perspective. You can read a great article by Nate Bowling, a past teacher of the year, addressing this inequality here. 

It's a Preschool time of year!

For those of us parents with kids older than 5, we know that January and February are cutthroat months! It's Preschool registration season or if not yet, it's coming! The intense battle for getting THE all important spot in THE all important preschool is an amazingly stressful experience.

Some of you may be reading this thinking, "It can't really be all that stressful." Oh.. you just don't know the half of it! Finding the right preschool become a near Hunger Games experience for some families. There is major wheeling and dealing to get kids registered into "elite" programs. My wife (Machc Photography) and I actually had a little celebration when we realized that we didn't have to worry about preschool for the next school year. Our twins will be moving on to Kindergarten!! No more private preschooling for a few years!! Then we'll have to get back into the preschool hunt for littlest. 

Having done this several times, I'd like to share some of the ways that we've made preschool hunting work for us!

1) Take the time to jot down your own expectations for your preschooler. What do you expect preschool to be like for your kiddo? What do you hope your kiddo will gain from their preschool experience? How big do you envision the class size? Do you want volunteer hours? What does pick-up and drop-off look like? Will there be field trips? Is daycare necessary? How about electives (e.g. Spanish, dance, music)? What does your monthly budget look like for tuition? Does your kiddo need special services, and if so, what specific support is needed? Is Religion a factor? How far away is it? This may seem like a lot, but in answering these questions my wife and I were set as to what we wanted for our kids. 

2) Research all of the local preschool options. Hit the internet, talk to neighbors, look for fliers and signs in the neighborhood or at church. Check with the local school district. Talk to anyone with kids to see what they did. Write it down, write it all down!

3) Go to any and all open houses or Preschool fairs.  This is a super MUST! You have to find a way to to see each school and really get a feel for the teachers. My wife is a part of the local Mom's Club, so when they hosted a Preschool Fair, we made sure to go! It was the deciding factor for us when we met the school staff of the school we decided to go to. You really need to meet the people you are going to be sending your 3 and 4 year old to! 

4) Apply to the top 3 schools. You are going to narrow your search down to the top 2 or 3. At this point, you have to stay on top of registration dates, and get materials in on time! To be safe, register for the 2 or 3 programs that will work for you and your kiddo. There is always a chance that you don't get into the school you want, so it's good to have a backup. Yes, you loose the deposit for the school you decide to not attend, but it's best to be safe! We applied to 2 programs this past year for our twins. We got into both, and picked our top school. 

This process has worked for us in two different states, and 4 different kiddos. The key to remember is that you really should go through a version of this each year just in case what you are looking for changes, or your kiddo's strengths or interests change. The school we had our twins in last year is not the school they're in this year. We re-evaluated what we were looking for, and found a better fit. Try not to get too wrapped up in the little things like location of the school. If the closest school is just convenient, but the best option is a 20 minute drive, consider which is actually best for the kiddo. We.. ok my wife.. drives 40 minutes round trip to take our kiddos to and from preschool 3 days a week. Is it a pain in the butt (is she a saint for doing it?)? Of course!! But man, they love the school, and WE love all that they are gaining! 

I hope this helps you first time preschool hunters! And re-enforces the work some of you parents have been putting in for a few years! Please share this with anyone you think might benefit from the advice from this father of 5! And use the comments section below to tell us about your favorite preschool and where it is! 

Our favorite in Alaska was Young Learners! Our oldest daughter had an amazing experience there! 

It's over!! THANK the MAKER!

As a kid Christmas was an amazing part of every year. It had everything I looked forward to, from gifts, to food, to family, and entertainment. I remember doing my homework in the living room listening to Bing Crosby's Christmas CD paying from the stereo. I loved it! I couldn't imagine how anybody could dislike this time of year.

Spring forward to the 37 year old me, and I get how it can happen. Life is full of things that either happen unexpectedly, or are a direct result of a decision you make. Sometimes those two things are amazing, and your life takes an up swing. But if they're not, life can hit a real dark, tough place. And when these hard moments happen at the holidays, it almost makes the hurt burden you more.

For some of us, the holidays reflect a feeling of loss or sorrow. A time where we miss the family or friends that aren't with us, for whatever reason. Maybe it's an unexpected passing, or time and space that keep you away. This Christmas marks the 9th year in a row that I've not been with my side of our family for the holidays. It's hard knowing that my kids have not created a memory of spending time with them in their lifetime.

Often times, it's easier to power through the missing of loved ones, when you can truly embrace the celebration of the season with those around you. There is nothing better than seeing the joy of Christmas in your kids. Having their spirit of youth and excitement propel you forward to decorating your home, and buying gifts. But again, that requires resources to make that happen. Sometimes finances aren't exactly where they need to be, because of decisions made (or not made) throughout the year. When you throw in money strain on top of feelings of loss or sorrow, it's difficult to find that "power through" and you find yourself taking down the Christmas decorations the day after.

And kids.. kids know things. If there is stress in the house, or pain, they can feel it. And over a two week period, those feelings can build up, and create behaviors that lead to lines in songs like, "And mom and dad can hardly wait for school to start again." Sprinkle in the breaking of the routine set from the school schedule, and parents are celebrating the new year for different reasons (only 2 more days, just 2 more days)!

For this year, I can't say that it's been too low of a down swing for my family. There were definitely amazing moments over the last two weeks. Time spent with my in-laws, and the magic in the eyes of my kids to name a few. But it wasn't all that it should have been for reasons out of my control, but for many that are in my direct decision making powers. So, I'm ready for this new year to continue on, so that I can work to make the 2016 end of year holidays better. Because next year, I don't want to be so excited to see the holiday pass.

So, Cheers to the excitement and possibilities of this new year. I look forward to keeping up with my The Teacher Dad site. Please take the time to follow me on Facebook and Twitter.